29th of October 2012

Hey! its been awhile cause i havent been home or didnt have time to blog at all. I thought things were getting better but i was totally wrong. i turn from the happiest guy in the world to one depress kid. My girlfriend cant stop thinking about her ex. Thats why she hasnt been able to give me the love i deserve. i totally understand but im cut cause it took her so long to tell me. ever since that day she said that she saw him. she thinks about him. it was awhile and so what? all the other days til today was a lie? all that love were fake? i dont even know if any of those memories and talk we had was ever real. Im not angry at her, i just cant get angry at her. i still love her heaps. i dont know what to do now though. i want to wait for her. i know shes worth waiting for, a girl like her is rare. Dont want to lose someone like her. When she told me this i was so cut and all i just went outside and started punching the wall. Brick walls. cried my eyes out. felt so shit so i asked for a smoke from a friend. and went for a drive. it calm me down heaps, i felt so much better. Belinda wanted to come over to see how i was doing? or something? i dont want her to come cause she just got good with her parents and i dont this ruining it for her. shes going through a lot already. i dont know what are we now. I just want to see her one last time and talk about this. After today ill just avoid her as much as i can. if youre reading this Belinda, to be honest from the very start i knew something like this would happen. a girl like you wont stay with a guy like me for more than 4 months.  Im sorry for not meeting your expectations, im sorry im not able to make you forget about him last of all im sorry for causing you more trouble :|

Andyy